Satire. Any resemblance to you is entirely down to your sense of self importance.

Monday, April 29, 2013

Bess Cavendish at Mau Mau, Portobello Road.



Bess was captivating!

You do not capture a butterfly in a net or a glass jar but in gentle hands that understand every nuance of that butterflies movements. 

Friday, April 26, 2013

Damian Lewis flogging the Jaguar F type: Desire.




Damian seems to be sporting an interesting hair dye job and hand drawn eyebrows in this little promo film for Jaguar. Obviously they couldn't get Daniel Craig to do it so Damian is the next best thing for the US market.

The car appears to be bolted together bits of Maserati, TVR, Fiat and anything else you care to mention.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Young entrepreneurs set for summer launch on Portobello Market


Young entrepreneurs set for summer launch on Portobello Market


I nicked this from 'Kensington & Chelsea Today'

Tuesday, 23rd April 2013
A fiercely fought competition to land an opportunity to trade on the world famous Portobello Market has seen three young entrepreneurs grab the chance to launch their products after they were named winners of the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea’s Market Enterprise Launch Pad (MELP) 2013.
Shani Grant, 22, who is starting a ‘tomboy’ fashion label called ‘Studz UK’, Remaro Hibbert, 25, owner of a positive message fashion label called ‘Point of View’ and Medina Mukhayer, 19, owner of ‘Mandola’ a company selling East African food and cultural goods, have each won: a £1,000 in start-up funds, six month rent-free market stall space on Portobello Market, a comprehensive support package from the Enterprise Lab and free business insurance. The Project was run by the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea.

Out of a total of 85 applications, nine young entrepreneurs were selected to pitch their ideas to a panel of judges, last Thursday 4 April, including representatives from the Council, Enterprise Lab, Rockstar Youth and Pret a Portobello. The judges had great difficulty selecting their top two candidates, the judges commented on the difficulty selecting two winners and although all finalists had brilliant business ideas and were feasible, some were better suited to a market environment than others.

Medina Mukhayer, 19, “I’m still in shock about winning, feels like the start of the rest of my life. I know I'll feel it after all the hard work, but because it's my own business I actually can't wait. I don't think I could have started my business if it wasn't for MELP, they really gave me all the tools and confidence I needed, especially as I had no qualifications.”

Remaro Hibbert, 25, “I'm happy to be one of the winners of MELP because it has given me an opportunity to really showcase my brand and actually make an impact.”
Shani Grant, 22, “Winning MELP feels fantastic, all the other entrepreneurs had solid ideas , so for my business to win MELP, I feel there is faith in my product which I never thought existed. I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone from the MELP team, Enterprise Lab and the judges, it was a great experience.”

All three will begin trading on Portobello Market in July.
Councillor Elizabeth Campbell, Cabinet Member for Family and Children’s Services, said: “The fact that the judges selected three young entrepreneurs instead of the usual two shows just how high the standard of competition was.  I wish all three young entrepreneurs the best of luck with their ventures.  Portobello Market is known across the world and has been the launch pad for many successful entrepreneurs.”
Follow MELP 2013’s journey on Facebook: Market Enterprise Launch Pad or Twitter: @RBKCMELP

Cherries in London.




















Photograph: Manon Morris.

Sunday, April 21, 2013

A little bit of Polish shit in Portobello.



This guy sells 'oil paintings' of London on a stall in Portobello.... I'd heard about this kind of shit being painted in China so I asked him: 'Is this shit painted in China'? He looked horrified and said: 'NO WAY. This shit is painted in Poland'.

Which ever way you look at it it is still tourist tat of the worst possible kind.

And however much you polish shit it is still shit!


Friday, April 19, 2013

Review: Sophie Barker at the Tabernacle.



Photograph: Manon Morris.

Okay! Let's get the negative dealt with first:

I have never heard such a fucking rude audience in my life. I've seen better mannered crowds at punk gigs in the 70's. Part of the audience tonight had no interest in the music and insisted on shouting at each other over the band. This was a well heeled bunch who should know better. I and my companions all were horrified.

Someone, rather than Sophie, who had to do it herself, should have told the idiots to shut up or go down to the bar below to honk and bray at each other. Ben the Bee (promoter) should have done something.... Oh well!

I know Sophie, I know how excited she was to be doing this (sell out) gig at the Tabernacle, I know how hard the band had worked to become so tight and right. Shame on you idiots for ruining it.

The band is good, Sophie is seriously good, she did some new stuff, some old stuff from the 'Seagull' album and a couple of covers  (the Cure and Fleetwood Mac) that made you wonder if they were not her own.

Sophie is about to go on another American tour, this time with The Egg, I hope American audiences are a little more appreciative.


Murray Lachlan Young's 'the Incomers'.





The writer, director and cast tell us about it.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

The ecstasy of pregnancy.


Murray Lachlan Young's obit to Maggie poem.


Murray wrote the following for his BBC Radio 6 slot but the powers that beeb chose to spike it:


Maggie: Obit poem.   Murray Lachlan Young   12/04/013

Farewell to you Maggie Oh Maggie farewell
Some eulogise you, some give you hell
Repeating the phrases that caused notoriety
Stating there is no such thing as society

Friend to the bank, brutally frank
Reagan’s big pal, rode in a tank
You mobilized classes with social volte-faces
You mangled the unions, kicked euro arses

Maggie, Maggie, Maggie!

You parleyed with Pinochet, gifted the satirist.
Nelson Mandela, you branded a terrorist
Flogged council houses, sold the utilities
Founded new Labour in all probability

One usually lost if one stood up and fought yer
You hammered your colleagues like lambs to the slaughter

Stated the falklands were ‘ours’ in totality
Turned the big bang to a fiscal reality
Littered the city with monstrous earning
The lady you stated was never for turning

Your standing its seems in the final prognosis
Reviled and admired in similar doses
Some will remember the chill in your air
Some will remember your teeth and your hair

But most that you gave and you asked for no quarter

Maggie, Maggie, Maggie

Over and out

But not bad for a greengrocers daughter

Friday, April 12, 2013

Thatcher to be buried in 'Green' reed coffin!

The family of recently deceased 83 year old thatcher Herbert 'Bunny' Peachey of Swaffam  have anounced that he will be buried in a coffin of his own making.

The coffin, entirely manufactured from the materials of his trade, is green and more importantly very very cheap. Says his son Margaret.

Neighbours of the never popular thatcher are not happy however at the councils decision to pay for the funeral as his family are refusing to do so. "Throw im inter fen'. Is the option favoured.

Bunny Peachy will long be remembered as the man who stole milk from children and set fire to the local school.
















Herbert Peachey, thatcher.

The worst meal I have ever eaten... The Dovey Inn, Aberdovey.


A few days spent in West Wales this week was only marred by the most awful meal I have ever  eaten.

The Dovey Inn in Aberdovey managed to produce a plate of inedible awfulness which can only be explained by a complete lack of concern for their customers. I guess they assume that their customer base is transient and unlikely to revisit. They seem to employ half wits and children in the bar and kitchen who cannot take an order properly, cannot pass on an order and certainly cannot cook anything resembling an appetising meal. Absolute shit!

I'd post a picture of the place but really can't be bothered.

The place is owned and run by S.A. Brain & co. A Cardiff based Brewery. They ought to put a great deal more effort into their management.

Avoid at all costs.

The previous day We had fish and chips at PD's Diner on the seafront in Aberystwyth which was great! The entire staff of the Dovey Inn should visit PD's in order to learn how to do it!













PD's Diner. Aberystwyth.





Photo's: Jan Nieupjur.

A picture of the sea.